48 Case Studies 33: Man, Ministry, Marriage

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Biff is a popular ministry leader whose love for his work has overshadowed his responsibilities in his marriage and with his children. This dualistic life has led to a fractured family and a dissatisfied wife. For years, Biff has lived a dual life—privately struggling with sin and neglecting his family while publicly portraying himself as a Christlike example to his local church.

Life Over Coffee Devotions

• 31-Day Marriage Devotion
• 31-Day Parenting Devotion
• 31-Day Young Adult Devotion

Biff acknowledges that he has been using ministry for selfish purposes, rationalizing his actions by muting his conscience through constant busyness. Biff’s sanitized sinning allowed him to justify his behavior and avoid addressing the deeper issues in his heart.

Over time, his hardened conscience and dissatisfaction led to more significant private sins, which he rationalized as a safe escape from his struggles. Despite recognizing the need for change, Biff is unwilling to face the possibility of losing his ministry, which has become an idol in his life.

The church leadership is unaware of Biff’s struggles, and the congregation continues to see him as an exemplary Christian leader. Meanwhile, his wife’s anger grows as she sees the disconnect between his public persona and private failures. Their children, increasingly disillusioned, are distancing themselves from the church.

Case Study Questions

1. How would you communicate hope to Biff’s wife?
2. What is Biff’s core problem, and why do you think so?
3. What is your detailed plan to help Biff change—assuming he is interested in changing?

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Rick Thomas

Rick launched the Life Over Coffee global training network in 2008 to bring hope and help for you and others by creating resources that spark conversations for transformation. His primary responsibilities are resource creation and leadership development, which he does through speaking, writing, podcasting, and educating.

In 1990 he earned a BA in Theology and, in 1991, a BS in Education. In 1993, he received his ordination into Christian ministry, and in 2000 he graduated with an MA in Counseling from The Master’s University. In 2006 he was recognized as a Fellow of the Association of Certified Biblical Counselors (ACBC).