Marriage Day 21: What You Communicate in Crisis

Marriage Day 21: What You Communicate in Crisis

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31-Day Marriage Devotion Resources

Count it all joy, my brothers, when you meet trials of various kinds, for you know that the testing of your faith produces steadfastness. And let steadfastness have its full effect, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing (James 1:2-4).

There are at least two parts to every crisis: what is happening to you in real time and space and what is spiritually happening inside of you as the Lord matures you through the trial. The first part is usually discernible to anyone associated with the crisis. The second part is not as perceptible to the person in the crisis or those observing the crisis. Typically, when I am experiencing a crisis, I can articulate what I am going through and the strategies I hope to implement to overcome it. From a practical perspective, it is important to let others know what I’m going through and my plans to bring the crisis to a desirable conclusion. My friends care about me; they want to know what is going on in my life, what my crisis management plans are, and what they can do to help. Caring for others is normal and expected Christian deportment. Thus, articulating, as appropriate with your close companions, is a humble thing to do so your friends can pray and assist you as you go through the crisis.

The Hard Side

Discerning the second, not-so-obvious part of trials is imperative for the Christian, too. This part is less about crisis management and more about what your Lord is teaching you as He takes you through the crisis. Our unbelieving culture has only one story: they can tell you what they are going through and what they plan to do about it. Their story is myopic in that they have no other benchmark or example to emulate. They find the best hope in their strength, ability, plan, strategy, and fortitude. However, Christians intuitively know that God is not only in the background of their stories but also actively speaking, working, and engaging on their behalf. The Christian understands that the stories they are going through are more about drawing attention to God than the actual real time and space aspects of the crisis. The crisis is the Christian’s opportunity to spread the fame of Jesus near and far. If the point of your life and marriage is more about God than yourself, as it should be, most assuredly, the hardships you go through are more about the glory the Father receives than the personal comfort or security you experience.

What He Said

My old friend Job reminds me of a believer who went through some of life’s most excruciating trials, but his faith, like a stained garment, bled through the pain he endured. Over the years, I have found inexpressible comfort in Job’s trust in God. He was weak, tired, and, at times, bitter. He received little help from his friends, and even his wife could have been a better supporter. God was determined not to give Job explanations for his trials. And for Job, it did not have to make perfect sense. His faith was not resting in the hope of understanding the problem but in a good God who was able to do the impossible. Here is what he said:

Then Job arose and tore his robe and shaved his head and fell on the ground and worshiped. And he said, “Naked I came from my mother’s womb, and naked shall I return. The LORD gave, and the LORD has taken away; blessed be the name of the LORD” (Job 1:20-21).

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Time to Reflect

When the movie about your marriage ends, what will people remember: the problems in your marriage or the Scriptwriter who did great things through you and your marriage, even using the hardships to mature you and spread His fame?

Practical Suggestion

Talk to your spouse about how God can be more glorified in your lives and marriage.

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