Case Study: How Do I Honor My Older Parents?

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Mable and Biff have a beautiful relationship. They married each other seven years ago. She and Biff have two kids, five and two years old. Mable’s mom has been pressuring her to spend more time with her during the week. Her dad is passive, and her mom has always been the aggressor in the home.

Biff has been working long hours, and their family time has been hit-and-miss. When he is home, she wants to make sure they are doing things together, so she prepares by completing errands, cleaning, laundry, and other chores.

Mable also homeschools their five-year-old, which has been difficult because it’s the first time she has done homeschooling. She is unsure of herself and struggles with the organizational and planning challenges that come with first-time homeschooling.

Her mom tells her that she needs to “obey and honor her parents” because the Bible says she should. Sarah is sensitive to the Lord and does not want to disobey in any way, but she does not have the time to love her husband well, serve the kids, run the home, and spend part of each day with her mother.

She comes to you for advice on how to navigate this dilemma.

Case Study Questions

1. What should honoring her mother look like for Mable?
2. Is Mable sinning by not spending time with her mother?
3. When the Bible says “Children obey your parents” how does that apply here?
4. How would you counsel Biff and Mable?

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Rick Thomas

Rick launched the Life Over Coffee global training network in 2008 to bring hope and help for you and others by creating resources that spark conversations for transformation. His primary responsibilities are resource creation and leadership development, which he does through speaking, writing, podcasting, and educating.

In 1990 he earned a BA in Theology and, in 1991, a BS in Education. In 1993, he received his ordination into Christian ministry, and in 2000 he graduated with an MA in Counseling from The Master’s University. In 2006 he was recognized as a Fellow of the Association of Certified Biblical Counselors (ACBC).