Ep. 277 People Who Do Not Respect Others Were Trained to Be This Way

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Shows Main Idea – Our culture has lost respect for each other and proper authorities. They did not become this way as adults but received early training from childhood because too many parents gave up their responsibility to train a child to honor and respect others. These children lost their way because their parents lost their way first. You don’t have to make this mistake. There is a path to respect, honor, and appreciate authority.
Show Notes
You may want to read:
Parents Lost Their Way
- Parents are unaware of what happened.
- It’s not that they do not love their children.
- But they have unwittingly given their authority and hierarchy to their children.
Back In the Day
- Schools used to have authority over children.
- Teachers used to have authority over children.
- Parents used to have authority over children.
The culture does not trust or empower these authorities now. Children have the power.
Kid’s Rule the Day
- Letting kids decide what is best for them is not always the best thing to do.
- Some parents no longer tell children what to do but ask them what they want.
- We’ve abdicated our role as parents by giving the authority to the children.
We’re more concerned about a child’s self-esteem; we say that we don’t want to hurt them. Joe Biden told a mom that if their child believes he’s a she, the mom should affirm the child’s belief, and the government should provide a path for the child to transition to their preferred gender.
Teach Them Diligently
Hear, O Israel: The LORD our God, the LORD is one. You shall love the LORD your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your might. And these words that I command you today shall be on your heart. You shall teach them diligently to your children, and shall talk of them when you sit in your house, and when you walk by the way, and when you lie down, and when you rise (Deuteronomy 6:4-7).
“Teach them diligently to your children.” Teach means to incise or cut into a stone. Parents should impress biblical values on their children firmly. We should teach them what is right and wrong.
Surrogate Parents
- Parents say they don’t want to impose their values on them, which turns the child loose to the culture and the Internet, which is a demographic that promotes self and undermines what is right and wrong.
Fearful Parents
- Part of the parental tension is that parents want their children to like them, which is the classic fear of man.
- These parents are insecure. Their desire for their child’s favor is more vital than being Christ to them.
- If your primary goal is to please your child, you will fail as a parent and set your child up for failure.
- If you provide biblical parameters for your child, they will respect you, and you may keep them from self-harm.
- E.g., giving a child a mobile device because “everybody has one.” The parent does not know how or even considers that they weaponize their child with a tool that could destroy his or her soul.
- If your child is mature enough to resist porn, the temptation of Instagram likes, or can “live without a phone,” then he or she could be ready to have one.
You can hate me now and love me later, or you can love me now and hate me later.
Teach Them Early
- Parents have a small window of time to teach their children respect, honor, and submission to authority. That time is between a child’s first and second years.
- You can train children after this time, but the most crucial window for helping them are the early ones.
- By the time the child becomes two years old, they feel their omnipotence, or what some parents call the “terrible twos.”
- It’s the parent’s job to let them know they are not omnipotent, and every human must submit to higher authorities.
- We respect authorities, i.e., parents, teachers, civil leaders, etc.
Give Them Attitude
- During these formative years, parents should discipline their children to create the concepts of respect and honor.
- To teach respect, you train them with the words “yes” or “no.”
- You may use other words that teach the heart attitudes: the child learns to listen and honor what the parent says.
- What you’re teaching is what is the difference between right and wrong.
- If the child learns morality early, it typically translates to respect for other authorities.
If you want to discuss these concepts more, you’re welcome to chat with us in our community.
Call to Action
- Do you struggle with fear or worry when it comes to mandating biblical perspectives on your children?
- Are you afraid of what others may think of you because you take biblical positions on marriage, parenting, and child-rearing?
- Do you give your child power over you because you don’t want them to reject you?
- Have you given in to your child only to realize later that you made a mistake because you were not firm?
If you struggle in any of these ways, I appeal to you to find help. You must grow in courage, wisdom, and practice, or you will export chaos to your child.
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Rick launched the Life Over Coffee global training network in 2008 to bring hope and help for you and others by creating resources that spark conversations for transformation. His primary responsibilities are resource creation and leadership development, which he does through speaking, writing, podcasting, and educating.
In 1990 he earned a BA in Theology and, in 1991, a BS in Education. In 1993, he received his ordination into Christian ministry, and in 2000 he graduated with an MA in Counseling from The Master’s University. In 2006 he was recognized as a Fellow of the Association of Certified Biblical Counselors (ACBC).