Affection for Christ

This graphic illustrates the profound impact that our affections have on our entire being—our desires, thoughts, behaviors, and ultimately, our lives. The central idea is that whatever we hold dear or cherish (our “affection”) becomes the driving force behind our desires. These desires, in turn, shape our thoughts, which then influence our behaviors. This process is a natural progression that underscores the importance of aligning our deepest affections with what is truly good and righteous.

1. Affection as the Core: The large circle in the center labeled “Affection” represents the core of our being. It signifies what we treasure most, what we are passionate about, and what occupies our hearts. This affection is the starting point, the source from which everything else flows.
2. Influence on Desires: The first branch off the central circle is “My Desires.” Our affections directly influence our desires. If our affection is set on worldly things, our desires will be for worldly pleasures. Conversely, if our affection is set on Christ, our desires will be aligned with His will and purposes.
3. Impact on Thoughts: The second branch is “My Thoughts.” Our desires fuel our thoughts. What we desire, we think about. For instance, if we desire success, our thoughts will be consumed with ways to achieve it. Similarly, if our desire is to honor Christ, our thoughts will be focused on ways to please Him.
4. Determination of Behaviors: The final branch is “My Life,” which encapsulates our words, behaviors, or actions. Our thoughts lead to our behaviors. If our thoughts are shaped by godly desires, our behaviors will reflect Christlike qualities. Conversely, if our thoughts are driven by selfish desires, our behaviors will be self-centered.

Biblical Context

The graphic ties into the biblical principle found in Matthew 7:16, “By their fruit, you shall know them.” This verse highlights the connection between what is in our hearts (our affections) and the visible evidence in our lives (our fruit). The fruit, which represents our words and actions, is a direct reflection of our affections. If someone exhibits ungodly behavior, it can often be traced back to an affection for something other than Christ.

Jesus also taught in Matthew 6:24 that “No one can serve two masters… You cannot serve God and money.” This teaching emphasizes that our affection cannot be divided. If we try to split our affection between God and worldly things, one will inevitably take precedence over the other. Therefore, for those who wish to produce godly fruit, it is essential to have Christ as their transcendent affection.

Case Study: Teaching Without Shepherding—Biff’s Missed Opportunity with Bert

Background: Biff is a respected member of his local church, known for his theological clarity and commitment to sound doctrine. He’s a self-starter, diligent in his study of Scripture, and regularly meets with men to teach them how to live godly lives. One of those men is Bert, a younger believer who came to Biff seeking help for chronic anger issues that were straining his marriage and work relationships. Biff, eager to help, walked Bert through Ephesians 4:22–24—the classic “put off, renew, and put on” passage. He taught Bert to put off anger, renew his mind with Scripture, and put on kindness and patience. It was all biblical, accurate, and structured. But over time, Bert’s growth stalled.

Problem: Bert seemed to make external progress at first. He memorized verses, avoided angry outbursts, and journaled about his thoughts. Yet internally, nothing seemed to change. His frustration would simmer until it boiled over in private. His “success” became a veneer. When Biff asked how things were going, Bert would say, “Better,” and Biff would encourage him to keep practicing what he had taught. But something was off. The root was untouched.

One day, Bert erupted at work, and the fallout was significant—damaged relationships, loss of respect, and deep conviction. He came to Biff in tears, not because he had sinned against others, but because he felt exposed. His anger was a symptom, not the cause. Biff realized in that moment that he had taught Bert behavior management, but not heart transformation.

Core Issue: As Biff reflected, he realized he had made a crucial error: he had instructed Bert rather than shepherded him. He hadn’t asked the hard questions that expose the affections of the heart. Why was Bert angry? What did his anger say about his desires? What did he love most in those moments when his temper flared?

Eventually, Biff discovered that Bert’s anger was rooted in a demand for control and comfort. His real affection wasn’t for Christ—it was for personal ease, respect, and autonomy. Whenever those things were threatened, anger took the stage. Bert’s core affection was misaligned. The fruit (anger) revealed the root (self-exalting desire).

Path to Change:

• Step 1: Confronting the Heart—Biff repented of his over-reliance on instruction and his failure to shepherd Bert’s heart. He began asking heart-probing questions: “What were you wanting in that moment?” “What seemed threatened when you became angry?” “Who was on the throne—Christ or you?”
• Step 2: Redirecting Affections—Together, they studied Colossians 3:1–4 and Psalm 73. They explored what it meant to set their affections on things above. Bert began to see that his true joy could not come from controlling people or securing comfort, but from surrendering to Christ’s rule. He had to put off not merely the expression of anger but the desires that fueled it.
• Step 3: Thought Renewal—As Bert’s affections shifted, his thoughts began to change. He meditated on the nature of God’s sovereignty and the humility of Christ. Philippians 2 became a foundational text. He began to think, “Christ gave up His rights—can I do the same when I’m disrespected?”
• Step 4: Reformed Behavior—Now, when Bert feels the pull of anger, he stops to examine the desires beneath it. He’s learning to put on patience, not out of duty, but as a reflection of his affection for Christ. His wife notices the change—not merely fewer outbursts, but genuine humility and love.

Outcome: Through this journey, Biff grew as a disciple-maker, realizing that true transformation is rooted in the affections. Bert experienced change not because of behavioral tweaks, but because his heart was realigned to treasure Christ above all. What began as a teaching session on behavior became a journey of uncovering the affections that rule the heart.

This case illustrates the danger of stopping at behavior modification. As the graphic illustrates, affection drives desires, which shape thoughts, which determine life. When Christ is the supreme affection, godly fruit follows. But if anything else holds that seat, the fruit will eventually reveal it. Biff’s transition from teacher to shepherd made all the difference—not just in Bert’s life, but in his own.

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Peace,
Rick