Ep. 553 A Relational Philosophy for Local Church Engagement

Shows Main Idea – I often get asked about our next speaking engagement—as if speaking from a stage is central to our ministry. It’s not. In this episode, I want to walk you through our philosophy of public speaking and why we don’t model our approach after the typical speaker circuit. For me, speaking is not a performance or platform-building opportunity—it’s about long-term discipleship and real relationships. I don’t have a few canned messages that I drop into a new location every weekend. Instead, we serve churches through a slow, intentional process that begins months before the conference and often continues for years afterward. We don’t stay in hotels. We live with the people. We eat with them, learn from them, adapt our content to their lives, and build connections that last. This episode unpacks our convictions around sanctification, discipleship, and the church—and why relational ministry, not performance ministry, is our model.

Show Notes

• View our speaking schedule
• Contact us to discuss speaking to your church or group

Podcast Outline:

Introduction

• Brief comment on the common question: “When’s your next speaking engagement?”
• Clarify that public speaking is not the engine of our ministry—and why.

Our Core Work Is Online, Not On Stage

• Explanation of why speaking is not central.
• The reach, consistency, and effectiveness of our online discipleship content.
• Stewarding our time to serve more people from home.

The Speaker Circuit vs. Relational Ministry

• Most speakers have a set of “talks” they do. We don’t.
• We don’t aim to hit every church in America—we build relationships.
• We would rather go to one church ten times than ten churches once.
• Why we don’t see sanctification as a one-off event, but a long-term process.

Conferences Are a Six-Month Process

• We start months before the event: planning, meetings, and dripping content.
• The importance of pre-conference connection and post-conference follow-up.
• The analogy: Showing up for a one-off conference is like a blind date.
• Most of the content is forgotten by Monday if there’s no relational context.

We Live With the People, Not in Hotels

• We stay in homes to build connection and community.
• Living among them helps us adjust our messages and know their needs.
• Sharing meals, talking informally, learning about their lives.

The Workload Is High—And That’s Intentional

• If we don’t leave town exhausted, it’s their fault—not ours.
• We ask churches to load up our schedule:
  • Counseling sessions
  • Elder consultations
  • Specific training for various groups (couples, teens, leaders, etc.)
  • Example: Third trip to Klamath Falls—35+ meetings including the actual conference.

How We Handle Support and Costs

• We don’t charge a speaking fee—just travel and food.
• Churches typically give an honorarium, but we avoid placing a burden on them.
• Donor and supporter community helps offset the cost of our time and labor.

Final Thoughts: Why This Matters

• Our goal isn’t to be famous or busy—but to be effective.
• Relational discipleship is slower—but it sticks.
• This model reflects our convictions about how sanctification happens.
• Encouragement for those wanting to bring us in: think long-term, not one-time.

Call to Action

• Please reach out if you want to explore a relational partnership.
• You can contact us from the ASK link in the navigation bar.

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Rick Thomas

Rick launched the Life Over Coffee global training network in 2008 to bring hope and help for you and others by creating resources that spark conversations for transformation. His primary responsibilities are resource creation and leadership development, which he does through speaking, writing, podcasting, and educating.

In 1990 he earned a BA in Theology and, in 1991, a BS in Education. In 1993, he received his ordination into Christian ministry, and in 2000 he graduated with an MA in Counseling from The Master’s University. In 2006 he was recognized as a Fellow of the Association of Certified Biblical Counselors (ACBC).