Universal Assumptions

When helping someone through the transformational process, it’s essential to remember that we shouldn’t be hesitant or fearful of engaging with them, thinking God cannot use us. Sometimes, people feel they cannot help someone change because that person’s life seems so different from their own.

However, there are universal truths about everyone that we can rely on. Despite their unique life stories and backgrounds, at the heart level, we are all quite similar. While each person has specific details about their lives—such as their upbringing, education, and personal experiences—these are merely the surface details.

We counsel at the heart level, diving beneath the surface to find common themes that resonate with all of us. These recurring themes reflect our shared humanity since we all descend from Adam. By focusing on the heart, we recognize that people are more alike than different.

There are 12 universal struggles that everyone faces to varying degrees:

1. Self-reliance: Struggling to trust God.
2. Control: Wanting to control our lives.
3. Comfort: Seeking comfort as an innate human need.
4. Fear: Dealing with fear.
5. Shame: Experiencing internal discomfort and awkwardness.
6. Guilt: Battling with feelings of guilt.
7. Faith and Unbelief: The tension between faith and doubt.
8. Self-righteousness: Struggling with self-righteous attitudes.
9. Sexuality: Navigating issues related to sexuality.
10. Anger: Managing anger.
11. Fear of Others: Being afraid of others’ opinions.
12. Suffering: Experiencing suffering.

These universal assumptions free us from needing to know every unique detail about someone’s life. Instead, we focus on the heart, where the commonality lies. As you look at these struggles, you see a diagnostic of Adam’s experience in the Garden of Eden—guilt, shame, fear, seeking comfort, taking control, and becoming self-reliant.

By recognizing these universal issues, we can counsel anyone effectively. We don’t need to be omniscient or understand 8 billion unique lives. Instead, we look beneath the surface and see the commonality we all share. We see an individual who, at their core, looks like Adam and like us.