Ep. 82 Dave Furman Interview, Author Of “Being There”

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Shows Main Idea – Dave Furman (ThM, Dallas Theological Seminary) serves as the senior pastor of Redeemer Church of Dubai in the United Arab Emirates, which he planted in 2010. Dave and his wife, Gloria, have four children. He is the author of, Being There: How To Love Those Who Are Hurting.

Show Notes

Everyone has friends or family who suffer from sickness, disability, depression, or the death of a loved one.

You may want to read:

• The Anniversary of the Worst Day of My Life
• God Is Incrementally Putting You To Death
• Beyond Your Ability? God Has You Right Where He Wants You

Dave Furman Questions

1. Describe your disease: what is the name of it? When did it begin? What does it do to you?
2. What were some practical things you did that helped you stop playing the “if only game?”
   • If only my arms weren’t hurting.
   • If only I were not struggling this way.
3. Your book is primarily for those who know the sufferer—the caregivers who suffer in silence. What would you say to those who do not know what to do or say to a person suffering?
4. Why is it important for those who are close to the sufferer to grieve their loss—the things they lost because of the other person’s suffering?
5. Why is the first answer in learning how to care for others starts with the caregiver’s relationship with Christ?
   • What are some practical ways the caregiver can strengthen his/her relationship with Christ?
6. Talk about the value of saying nothing. I’m referring, of course, to the title of the book, and your thoughts about Job’s friends not saying anything and how not saying anything can be helpful.
7. Where does laughter fit into the relationship of the sufferer and the caregiver? Why is it significant?
8. How do you respond to the “cures” you receive from caring friends? What are some helpful things people say that does encourage you?
9. How do you guard against your suffering becoming your identity? How can a person care for you but yet not make your suffering the center of how you relate to each other?

Recommended Books

• Gospel Primer by Milton Vincent
• Spiritual Depression, D. Martin Lloyd Jones

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Rick Thomas

Rick launched the Life Over Coffee global training network in 2008 to bring hope and help for you and others by creating resources that spark conversations for transformation. His primary responsibilities are resource creation and leadership development, which he does through speaking, writing, podcasting, and educating.

In 1990 he earned a BA in Theology and, in 1991, a BS in Education. In 1993, he received his ordination into Christian ministry, and in 2000 he graduated with an MA in Counseling from The Master’s University. In 2006 he was recognized as a Fellow of the Association of Certified Biblical Counselors (ACBC).