Case Study: The Nagging Wife

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People picked on Mable all her life. Her parents were never satisfied with her. Mable’s earliest memories of her parents were their displeasure with her. They were more interested in how Mable looked in social contexts than how she was doing personally.

This fear-based model of parenting drove Mable to find ways she could prove that she was not as unsatisfying as her parents communicated to her. One of Mable’s techniques to “feel better about herself” was to criticize others. Whether she verbally or quietly judged individuals as inferior, it helped to elevate Mable in her mind.

Biff was aware of Mable’s insecurity, but she was a physically attractive virgin. Mable was a good catch. He didn’t see her life-dominating fearfulness as being a problem. But within the first two years of their marriage, Biff became painfully aware that he could not please Mable.

Biff’s desire for acceptance drove him to find approval through sinful means. He was caught and is seeking help currently. And the counselor is also aware of Mable’s life-long battles with insecurity. But the problem is that he does not know how to approach her. Though Biff is responsible for his actions, Mable must learn how her nagging played a part in Biff’s struggles.

Case Study Questions

1. How and why would you approach Mable?
2. What are Mable’s core problems and solutions?
3. How would a right understanding and application of the gospel radically change their marriage?

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Rick Thomas

Rick launched the Life Over Coffee global training network in 2008 to bring hope and help for you and others by creating resources that spark conversations for transformation. His primary responsibilities are resource creation and leadership development, which he does through speaking, writing, podcasting, and educating.

In 1990 he earned a BA in Theology and, in 1991, a BS in Education. In 1993, he received his ordination into Christian ministry, and in 2000 he graduated with an MA in Counseling from The Master’s University. In 2006 he was recognized as a Fellow of the Association of Certified Biblical Counselors (ACBC).