Thinking about Those People Who Are Not Like You

Thinking about Those People Who Are Not Like You

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As the divide in our country continues to widen, the temptation to be harsh, sinfully angry, or retaliate in ungodly ways toward those who think differently from you is high. There are times when we can think more highly of ourselves and less considerate of others, especially when they do things that frustrate us. It’s in these critical moments that the gospel must level our hearts. If not, we may go to some dark places.

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Time to Self-Assess?

When thinking about others, the best place to always begin is with a “gospel exam.” You can do this by answering a few self-assessment questions. Carefully think through these questions to see if any apply. It may benefit you to discuss them with a friend or a small group of like-minded disciplers.

  • Are you frustrated with anyone?
  • Are you impatient with someone?
  • Do you look down on others?
  • Are you unsympathetic toward the struggler?
  • Are you critical of people who can’t kick their habit?
  • Do you feel superior toward certain ethnic groups?
  • Are you condescending toward gay people?
  • What about those on the other side of the political aisle?

I’m asking if there are sinners in your sphere of influence with whom you struggle in your heart. Perhaps I did not ask the right question. What if you supplied one that is more accurate? If you answered yes to any of these heart queries, you not only need a gospel checkup, but you need a gospel fix.

Back to the Basics

The next stage of your gospel exam is to reflect upon a few foundational thoughts about Hamartiology—the Doctrine of Sin. Understanding the pandemic reality of sin, its noetic effect (impact on our minds), and the truths of total depravity are vital when thinking about how you relate to others. How would you answer these two questions?

  • Are you a sinner because you sin?
  • Or do you sin because you are a sinner?

Theologically speaking, you sin because you are a sinner. Some evangelistic methods seek to get people to admit their sinfulness by showing them how they have sinned. The thought goes that if they can get the unregenerate person to admit any sin, they will see the need for a Savior. In a sense, this approach is not wrong.

Most certainly, if you or I have sinned, we need a Savior, but a more foundational truth presupposes whether we have sinned or not. We are sinners (Romans 3:10-12; Isaiah 64:6) regardless of whether we can recollect past transgressions. Though it is not possible for a human not to sin, owning up to our sin is not necessary to be guilty before the Lord.

  • I am human
  • I am sinner

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The Adamic Package

Sin comes with the Adamic package. Of course, there are differences in the kind and consequences of our sins, but there are no differences from one human to the next as far as being a sinner. Adolf Hitler, Ted Bundy, Rick Thomas, Donald Trump, and any other person you want to name other than Christ are guilty before God.

The number, kind, or consequences of our sins is another story (James 2:10). God does not see big sinners and little sinners but considers all of us as sinners in need of the redemptive work of His Son. The only difference in the list of folks I named is whether they have asked the Savior to regenerate them.

The question is not what sins have you committed, but have you been born again (John 3:7)? We are sinners in need of salvation (Romans 3:23). Though there are a time and context to distinguish the type and consequences of our transgressions, it’s not where you should begin. The starting place for discussions about sin should be on a level footing, somewhere near the cross.

Big and Little Sinners

I have heard many testimonies about drug addicts, prostitutes, or former inmates who shared their stories about God’s saving grace. In each case, it has been something to celebrate. As fantastic as their testimonies were, I’ve never considered them more profound than the five-year-old girl who attended Sunday school and was regenerated by Christ’s grace.

This girl grows into a God-loving teenager, marries a Christian man, and never knows the stinging anguish of brokenness like the addict, prostitute, or inmate. Nevertheless, she and the convict were the same in God’s sight before their regeneration. I’m not saying we should downplay the salvation of the convict. I am saying that the convict and the Sunday school attender were no different before their conversions.

Although some may argue that the former inmate has a better testimony, I suggest that the little girl’s “God’s story” might be better. Hers is about the power of the gospel that saves a young child and keeps her living in the good of that gospel throughout her life. The persevering strength of the gospel is incredible and other-worldly. To sin is weakness and not other-worldly.

Sin Is Easy, Peasy

It is easy for sinners to get angry, be impatient, gossip, overeat, or end up in prison if they followed their natural desires. We are all weak when it comes to sinning, and temptations are mighty, which is why we quickly yield to them. The empowering grace of God is much more durable and profound (2 Corinthians 12:9-10).

It is God’s strength that saves and continually helps us become holier (1 Corinthians 1:18; Romans 1:16-17). The testimony of the inmate and five-year-old equally speaks volumes about the goodness and power of the gospel. Let me ask you a few more questions.

  • Do you feel that your (ontological) condition before your salvation was not as bad as someone else’s?
  • Do you connect your passion for the Savior to the kinds of sins you committed or the fact that you were a sinner, regardless of the type or degree of your transgressions?
  • Are you stunned and amazed by the gospel, to the point that it manifests in daily passion? Why or why not?

Gospel Generated Passion

Some Christians who were saved early in life struggle to apply the gospel in practical ways—particularly after they become adults. They specifically struggle with a lack of daily passion for what God did for them at the cross. Some of them are not as amazed by the gospel’s truths as others who may have had a more difficult path to the cross.

I am not talking about emotionalism, though a lack of emotion could be part of their issue. Whether your hands are down by your side or up in the air, when you reflect upon the glories of the cross is not as important as the condition of your heart when you think about that cross.

There can be a deception for those regenerated at a young age. These believers could think they have not committed as many sins or the darker acts that they see in the culture. This deception could trick them into believing they are better than those with the more scandalous or flagrant sins.

Are You Grateful?

Though they would quickly tell you that every person has sinned, no one is righteous, and grace rather than our works saves us, some of these believers have not fully transitioned from what they know to be accurate to how they live these truths out on a day-to-day basis (Romans 3:10-12, Romans 3:23; Ephesians 2:8-10). While they may ace the “Christian 101 Exam,” they do not do as well when it comes to living the gospel out in their daily sanctification. There are two areas where you will find evidence of this truth.

  • A lack of gratitude for temporal provisions as well as spiritual blessings from God
  • A temptation to look down on others who are not like them

When a person can juxtapose these two equal and corresponding truths—I was the world’s worst sinner, and God showed me mercy, they reduce the temptations toward a lack of gratitude or judgmentalism in proportion to their daily understanding and practice of these truths in their lives (1 Timothy 1:15-16).

  • Do you believe if you had sinned more before God saved you, that you would be more passionate for Him now?
  • Do you lack daily gratitude for what God did for you on the cross?
  • As you reflect, what specific ways do you need to change your thinking about yourself, God, and others?

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Who Is the Worst?

From your perspective, who is the worst sinner you have ever known? If you could ask the great apostle Paul this question, he would answer it definitively. He would say it was him! From his perspective, he was the foremost sinner. Paul was more aware of what he had done to Christ than what anyone else had done to Him (1 Timothy 1:15).

From a quantity, type, or consequential perspective, other sinners in Paul’s world were worse than he was, but it didn’t affect his thinking as far as how he saw himself before salvation. Paul knew himself to be the worst sinner. Paul had the right attitude on how we should view ourselves before we begin to think about others. Jesus said it this way,

Why do you see the speck that is in your brother’s eye, but do not notice the log that is in your own eye? Or how can you say to your brother, “Let me take the speck out of your eye,” when there is the log in your own eye? You hypocrite, first take the log out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to take the speck out of your brother’s eye (Matthew 7:3-5).

Comparison Thinking

To miss the Savior’s point is to lose a fundamental, practical outworking of the gospel. It goes like this: “Rick was the chief of sinners before Christ regenerated him.” The Christian who does not see himself as the worst sinner ever saved will succumb to the temptation to compare himself to others based on what they have or have not done.

Not that we dare to classify or compare ourselves with some of those who are commending themselves. But when they measure themselves by one another and compare themselves with one another, they are without understanding (2 Corinthians 10:12).

Comparison thinking creates degrees and levels for categorizing believers and unbelievers. In reality, there are only two kinds of sinners, with no degrees or levels.

  • Unsaved sinners, called pagans, unregenerate, lost, unbelievers, or children of Satan
  • Saved sinners, called saints, regenerate, believers, or children of God

This issue is ontological—your state of being—rather than what you have done, good or bad. In this context, it will not matter what sins you have committed when you stand before God. What you have done is not my point here. The issue on that day will be your relationship, or lack thereof, with the Son of God.

You’re Self-Righteous When

If you categorize people as good or bad based on your list of acceptable or unacceptable behaviors, you’re self-righteous, the fundamental sin that feeds racism, legalism, and other judgmental or uncharitable attitudes. We all do this. To see if you have strayed from the practical outworking of the gospel in this matter, assess yourself against these self-righteous sins.

  • Criticizing
  • Complaining
  • Gossiping
  • Distancing yourself from others (not out of fear, but disdain)
  • Looking down on others
  • Judging others uncharitably
  • Comparing yourself to others
  • Thinking of yourself better than others
  • Unwilling to pray for others
  • Unwilling to forgive others
  • Rolling your eyes when thinking about others
  • Impatient or unkind toward others

Hanging with Corinthians

Paul knew a few Christians who had many of these issues. I am sure some of them were worse than he was from a quantity, type, or consequential perspective. But when he looked at himself, he realized he was the chief of all the sinners in the group, a sinner whom God showed mercy (1 Timothy 1:15-16).

If you believe you are the worst sinner ever saved, you have a fundamental yet profound understanding of the gospel. Do you have a better-than attitude when you think of others? One of the ways you can think about this question is by asking yourself a few more.

  • Have you ever gossiped?
  • Have you ever gotten sinfully angry?
  • Have you ever been impatient?
  • Have you ever criticized anyone?
  • Have you ever slandered anyone?

If you answered yes to any of these questions, you have yielded to the sin of self-righteousness, a better-than attitude that affirms that you don’t need Christ because He came for the unrighteous, not the righteous. The solution to your dilemma is only a prayer away. If you look down on others or struggle with others, may I appeal to you to wrestle through these thoughts and find a friend to help you?

Call to Action

  1. There is a difference between reactive and reflective self-righteous judgments. Everybody reacts episodically to things they don’t like in others. You want to minimize those episodes. Then there are reflective judgments where you think uncharitably about people or people groups habitually. This latter characterization is a pattern that needs your active and prompt repentance. You’re either in one group or the other. Which is it? Do you occasionally react unkindly toward others, or is it your habit to be this way?
  2. Ask the Father to give you a gospel reorientation. Learn from Paul. The key to his ability to serve sinful people like the Corinthians was because he never forgot where he came from and who he was before Christ saved him. God does not see big sinners and little sinners but considers all of us as sinners in need of the redemptive work of His Son.

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